This morning I took a parenting survey. Not like a fun Facebook survey that will tell me all about my parenting style or what state I should raise my kid(s), but more of a medical research autism parenting survey.
Some of the questions made me sad - like the ones about Norrin's friendships. Other questions just seemed odd like, "Think carefully and count the number of things which your child does that bothers you. (choices: 1 - 3, 4 - 5, 6 - 7, 8 - 9 or 10+)" For the most part, I flew through the survey, checking off my answers with ease but a few questions made me stop and think about our day to day life. Like this question -- How do you rate yourself as a parent?
The survey was confidential but I still felt the weight of what I would answer.
Yes I've had my moments where I've done things I never thought I was capable of doing. Like the time when I filed for impartial hearing (twice) without a lawyer. But I don't think that makes me an "excellent" parent. Those were singular moments, that's not my norm.
I have my above average parenting moments when I read a bedtime story and make reading a part of our daily routine - even on days when our schedule is full. (I like to think that I set the example as well. Norrin always sees me reading and we make books easily accessible to him.) Or days when I've had little to no sleep but I wake early enough to make lunch and get him to the bus on time.
And I'm certain I have below average days but I'll never share any of those moments. (Because a mom blogger has to leave a little bit of mystery...)
Most days, I think I'm just average. I let my kid drink soda and watch too much TV. I'd rather order take-out than cook dinner. I don't think I've ever sent Norrin to school with a hot breakfast. Nope, we're all about cereal with milk on the side. And sometimes I forget about brushing teeth before bed. I don't always remember to wash his hands after we come in from the playground. I don't always carry band-aids with me and I usually forget to pack snacks when we go out. I've sent him to school without his schoolbag. I've been late for the school bus. And I've missed more than my fair share of PTA meetings. I don't create Pinterest-worthy lunches, go crazy decorating for holidays or plan big birthday parties. I don't always stop what I'm doing when Norrin calls. And I yell probably more than I should.
But no matter what I do or don't do, Norrin always knows he is loved.
I don't think about being an excellent mom or an average mom. I'm just a sleep deprived mom trying to get through the day.
All that being said, for the sake of the survey - I answered b because e wasn't one of the options.

Labels: Atypical Mami, Autism Parenting, Parenthood, Parenting, Pour Your Heart Out, Special Needs Parenting